The True Feelings Of A Technical Immigrant

My MCAT is less than two weeks away, and needless to say I am stressed. The Medical College Admissions Test, a very simple name, for a very complicated exam.   Why am I stressed over one exam? Why does one 8 hour period of my life weigh so heavily on my mind? Why is it the constant thing on my mind, forefront before everything else? Why have I allowed myself to put everything on hold for this one exam?             Is it because I feel as if my entire future is dependent on this one exam? Yeah, probably. I have convinced myself that this one number will be the defining number of my life. I have decided that one number will be what represents me. A number will define a human being. A score, from one exam, will explain all my complexities. And I refuse to see how wrong that is. I refuse to acknowledge that a number will not define me, my actions, my thoughts, my hard work will, but a number will not.             Yet here I sit, overwhelmed and filled with anxiety all o

Sometimes I go long months without writing, and sometimes I have to write every day that week. It depends on hundreds of things: the time, do I have time to write, is there something I need to say, etc. etc. So why am I writing now? Well because now I’m sitting in the room I grew up in, except it looks nothing like the room I grew up in. No my parents didn’t decide change my room the minute I left for college, in reality this room had been changed years before that. The room began to change when I changed. This room tucked away in the back corner of my house, has seen so much change in the past 13 years. It started off as a home to a little six-year-old who was upset to leave her old room-the one with pink and purple walls-and who had to live in a new room-one with plain white walls. The six-year-old who had to decide how her new room would look, and was overwhelmed with the possibilities. It was a room to a wild, curious, happy little girl who didn’t let the world define her. She w